Pioneers of Neo-Sexism: AC/DC

With a new album set to drop in October, (pre-order Black Ice from AC/DC is slowly emerging from its self-induced exile to once again endure the spotlight. This seems like a ritual that happens far too infrequently. Stephen McGinty writes:

There is something about AC/DC that brings out the best in people. They are universally loved, guaranteed to sell out any tour and almost unique in the musical firmament for refusing to write songs with any political message, unless you include peons to the pleasures of having sex with large-breasted women, an anti-feminist diatribe, or a skewed celebration of femininity.

Their lyrics are woefully direct. When my wife finally succumbed to their brilliance and began singing the songs out loud, I had to stop her when she sang one lyric as: “Let me cogitate with my mind…” The very notion of Brian Johnston [sic], the Newcastle singer who took over after Bon Scott choked on his own drunken vomit in 1980, actually using the word “cogitate” in a song is hilarious. The line, in fact, was: “Let me cut your cake with my knife”.

In honor of the upcoming release, NeoSexist proudly presents the top 10 AC/DC songs that exemplify the band’s “celebration of femininity”

10. Girls Got Rhythm (Highway to Hell, 1979)

Bon is clearly singing about a one-in-a-million girl. This song is a celebration of a womanly virtues and empowerment. This woman knocks men off their feet and can start a landslide just by walkin’ down the street.

I been around the world, I’ve seen a million girls
Ain’t one of them got, what my lady she’s got
She stealin’ the spotlight, knocks me off my feet
She’s enough to start a landslide
Just walkin’ down the street
Wearin’ dresses so tight, and lookin’ dynamite
About to blow me out
No doubt about it, can’t live without it

The girl’s got the rhythm
The girl’s got the rhythm
She got the back seat rhythm
The girl’s got the rhythm

9. Whole Lotta Rosie (Let there be Rock, 1977)

Beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes. This song has done a lot to combat our cultures obsession with stick-thin models and has no doubt helped many women who struggle with “body-image” issues.

Never had a woman
Never had a woman like you
Doing all the things
Doing all the things you do
Ain’t no fairy story
Ain’t no skin and bone
But you give it all you got
Weighing in at nineteen stone

8. Squealer (Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap, 1976)

This is a tender ballad of young love and innocence lost. Its profundity is only matched by the mature and delicate fashion in which its universal themes are handled.

She said she’s never been
Never been touched before
She said she’d never been
This far before
She said she’d never liked
To be excited
Had to fight it (and she never won)
She said she’d never been
Never been balled before
N’ I don’t think
She’ll ever ball no more (fixed er good)
Squealer – when I held her hand
Squealer – made her understand
Squealer – when I kissed her lips
Squealer – and sucked her finger tips
Squealer – she started getting hot
Squealer – made it hard to stop
Squealer – it got too much
Squealer – I think I’ve got the magic touch
[ad infinitum]

7. Let’s Get it Up (For Those About to Rock, 1981)

This song obviously extols the virtues of egalitarianism and collaboration. Man and woman, working together, to reach a common goal.

Loose lips sink ships
So come aboard for a pleasure trip
It’s high tide, so let’s ride
The moon is rising and so am i

I’m gonna get it up
Never gonna let it up
Cruisin’ on the seven seas
A pirate of my loving needs

I’ll never go down, never go down
So let’s get it up
Let’s get it up, get it right up
Let’s get it up, right to the top
Let’s get it up, right now

6. Shot of Love (The Razor’s Edge, 1990)

A noble man sacrificing for the woman he loves. Always giving and never taking. This song is a pledge to fulfill all of a woman’s needs.

Rock you little lady make you blow and bleed
A little bit of what you need is guaranteed
Come on now honey we’ll get full of desire
A humping and a bumping till we start a fire

And I warn you
It’s the best shot of your life

5. You Shook Me All Night Long (Back in Black, 1980)

A simple tribute to the power that women hold over men.

She was a fast machine she kept her motor clean
She was the best damn woman that I ever seen
She had the sightless eyes telling me no lies
Knocking me out with those American thighs
Taking more than her share
Had me fighting for air
She told me to come but I was already there
‘Cause the walls start shaking
The earth was quaking
My mind was aching
And we were making it

And you shook me all night long
Yeah you shook me all night long

4. Given the Dog a Bone (Back in Black, 1980)

Like Whole Lotta Rosie before it, this song proves that AC/DC is not a shallow and misogynistic band. They have a true appreciation of all types of women. You don’t have to be a “playboy star” to deserve the “bone.” The “bone” here, would be a metaphor for something akin to undying love and respect.

She take you down easy
Going down to her knees
Going down to the devil
Down down to ninety degrees
Oh, she’s blowing me crazy
Till my ammunition is dry

Oh, she’s using her head again
She’s using her head
Oh, she’s using her head again

She’s no mona lisa
No, she’s no playboy star
But she’ll send you to heaven
Then explode you to mars

3. Let Me Put My Love Into You (Back in Black, 1980)

A tale of seduction so timeless that these words could have been written by Casanova himself. No woman could resist the ribald charm of the “cake and knife” metaphor.

Don’t you struggle
Don’t you fight
Don’t you worry
’cause it’s your turn tonight

Let me put my love into you, babe
Let me put my love on the line
Let me put my love into you, babe
Let me cut your cake with my knife

2. Cover You in Oil (Ballbreaker, 1995)

A song about a man, perhaps an aspiring masseur, tending to his woman’s desires. Luxuriating her in the pleasures of scented oils and candles, no doubt. Similar to a trip to a day spa.

I like to slip into something good
I see a young girl in the neighborhood
The way she move, I must confess
I like to run my hands up and down her legs
The way she dress, she look so fine
I’ll make her wet, I’ll make her mine
She like it hard, she like it slow
All right honey, come on lets go

Cover you in oil
I wanna cover you in oil
Let me cover you in oil

Pull on the zip, she give good lip service
It’s nothing for the show, I just pay to see her go
She make you hot, you spray your lot

1. Go Down (Let There Be Rock , 1977)

This is a song about getting head. Period. Welcome back, guys.

Ruby, Ruby, where you been so long
Done took to drinkin’ whiskey
Baby since you been gone
Ain’t no one I know do it as good as you
Lickin’ on that lickin’ stick the way you do
You got the lips to make a strong man weak
And a heathen pray
Tell you ain’t just the way you speak
You know it’s just the way you go down
Go down, go down, go down, go down
Go down, go down, go down, go down
Mary, Mary, you’re the one for me
And the way you hum
Sting like a bumble bee
I’ll be around to see you ’bout half past ten
Ain’t felt this good
Since I don’t know when
You got the touch that I need so much
In your finger tips
I got the honey that ya love to taste
On those lovely lips so go down
Go down, go down, go down, go down
Go down, go down, go down, go down
Baby rub it on
Y’ know it’s sticky and sweet
And it’s been so long
And no else got a touch like you
I let you do the things to me
I let no other woman do
Feels good, feels good,
You do it like you should
I loved you so much
Make me so glad I’m a man
Go down, go down, go down, go down
Go down, go down, go down, go down

  • MR Riot

    You definately missed “She’s got balls”.

    She’s got style that woman
    Makes me smile that woman
    She’s got spunk that woman
    Funk that woman
    She’s got speed my lady
    Got what I need my babe
    She’s got the ability, hey
    To make a man outta me

    But most important of all
    Let me tell you
    My lady’s got balls
    She’s got balls
    She’s got balls
    She’s got balls

    She’s got soul my lady
    Likes to crawl my lady
    All around the floor on her hands and knees
    Oh because she likes to please me

    But most important of all, ah
    Let me tell you
    The lady’s got balls
    She’s got balls
    She’s got balls
    She’s got balls

    And she’s got taste my lady
    Pace my lady
    Makes my heart race
    With her pretty face
    She’s got balls my lady
    Likes to crawl my lady
    Hands and knees all around the floor
    No one has to tell her what a fella is for

    But let me tell you all, ooh yeah
    The lady’s got balls
    She’s got balls, she’s got balls
    She’s got balls, she’s got balls
    She’s got balls, my lady’s got
    She’s got balls, balls
    She’s got balls, get it on
    She’s got balls